Dealing With the Low-Bubblers
/It took me a couple read-thrus but your posts earlier this year about the “bubble” [Feb 26, 27, 28} really changed my approach to performing magic and led to a whole different level of reactions.
One thing I’d like to hear you talk about is how you deal with people who have a “low bubble set point” (if that’s the right phrasing). How do you deal with people who naturally have a low appreciation for magic if showing them stronger magic isn’t the key to getting them to like it more? —WL
This is a good question. Here’s what I recommend.
First, if you have someone who doesn’t enjoy magic, then don’t show them magic. There is nothing that brings down a performance than trying to rope someone in who doesn’t appreciate it. I have enough experience now that if I show someone a trick on an occasion or two and they’re not enthusiastic about it, then I just don’t bother showing them anything in the future. Magic is an interest of mine, it’s not my identity. If someone doesn’t dig it, then that’s fine with me.
I will sometimes try to get them to feel like they’re missing out by performing for friends we have in common, or something like that. But I’m not going to force anything on them. Occasionally they’ll ask why I don’t show them anything and I’ll say, “Oh, I didn’t get the sense that you were into it.” I don’t get weird about it. I’m not like, “Well, I DID show you something once and you barely said anything about it, so why would I show you anything again if you’re not going to appreciate it? I’ve got better things to do with my time.” My attitude is—and this is my actual attitude, not an act I’m putting on for them— “Oh, I just didn’t think you were interested in it. I’m happy to show you something anytime you want to see. Just ask.” This puts the onus on them.
These days, almost all my performing is done on an opt-in basis. I’m performing for people who want to see stuff. I don’t have to chase anyone.
But here’s a technique you can use if you meet someone who expresses a disinterest in magic.
Them: So I heard you do magic?
You: Yeah, a little bit.
Them: God, I hate magic tricks.
You: Oh, I know what you mean. I couldn’t stand them for a long time. Like card tricks and stuff? What’s the point? But a few years ago I met this woman who showed me some stuff that’s on a whole different level. It completely changed my opinion on what magic could be.
See? You meet them where they are: “Oh yeah, magic sucks.” Then you imply that the stuff you’re doing is not what they’re used to.
The best way to get people to be open to changing their opinion is not by arguing against that opinion but by identifying with it.
If you say, “I hate jazz.” And I say, “No! You have to listen to this album. It’s so good. I promise. You’ll like it.” That’s likely just going to make you more entrenched in your anti-jazz position.
But if you say, “I hate jazz.” And I say, “Oh god. I totally get that feeling. Some jackass honking tunelessly on a saxophone? Squee-doodley-doo-dottin-doo. No thanks. Give me lyrics and a chorus. That was always my opinion too. Then about 18 months ago I heard this jazz album that completely blew me away.” Now, I will have at least piqued your curiosity and planted the seed that this is the sort of album that is capable of changing your mind about the subject.
You can do the same thing with magic, so long as you have something to show them that doesn’t just feel like the same thing they already decided they didn’t like.