Nutless Wonders

Next month we get into No-Nut November. That is the month where some guys dedicate themselves to not having an orgasm for thirty days. Some do it for potential health benefits, others just do it as a challenge to themselves.

But you can also do it (or just say you’re doing it) as a long-form magic premise. Just mention early on in the month that you’re doing No-Nut November and you’re following a program where the retention of semen and sexual energy is supposed to amplify psychic abilities.

Then, three or four times during the month, test out these abilities with your target spectator. This long-form presentation would finish with what is hopefully a profound demonstration of psychic power at the end of the month.

For example, let’s say you’re going to end with a mind-reading card trick (which isn’t that exciting, but will serve fine as an example). The first time you meet up, you’re not getting any information better than chance. The next time you’re identifying the colors of the cards (red or black) at a 90% clip. At the following meet-up you’ve mastered colors and are now pretty decent with suits. And then, at the final meet-up, you’re able to read their mind of the specific cards they’re thinking of.

I’ve never done this specific presentation with someone, but I’ve done similar things where the spectator sees me progress at something over time and it always seems to keep them engaged and intrigued, even if the ultimate goal isn’t all that exciting, e.g., learning how to know what playing card someone is thinking.

Certainly they’re going to understand you’re probably not 100% serious, but seeing someone progress along a path of learning is just one of those things that’s interesting to people. And while this is something that would occur over the course of a month, it would only take a few minutes each time you get together. So it’s not a huge investment of time.

I can certainly see that some people might find this a little too risqué for the people in their life. Personally, I don't see it that way. You might not want to do it for your boss or pastor, but very few people in my life would bat an eye at this.

If you have a target audience in mind, but you don't see them that often, you could have the preliminary stages occur over video-chat, once a week, leading up to an in-person meeting at the end of the month.

Then, if you really have someone who's into the spirit of this, early the following month (Destroy Dick December) you can do a final pièce de résistance. You tell them, "Look, I'm about to go in the other room and have at myself big time. Here's the thing, the psychic energy I've been building and manifesting for the past month will be released at that time, but it doesn't dissipate immediately. If you come in the room afterwards, you'll be able to absorb a bunch of that energy. Now, to be clear, I'm talking about energy here. I'm not asking you to expose yourself to any fluids, just energy. And when you do, you'll be able to demonstrate some pretty impressive psychic phenomena." So now you turn this month-long project into a spectator-as-mindreader type of plot.

Yes, again, this is not for everyone. But for one of your guy friends, or someone you're in a relationship with, or someone you have some sexual flirtation with, or just someone who isn't easily offended, I think this trick would be a ball (sorry). I mean loads of fun (shit, I didn't mean that). I mean it would be a blast (no, that's not good either). What I mean is, it would be an enjoyable "story" to unfold over a few weeks, and the "twist" ending—where they are able to absorb the energy and do something themselves—would be a perfect climax. (Really, my bad.)